


when the work of grief is done

by Moriavis



Category: The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: ColdFlash Week 2019, Grief, Jewish!Len, Leonard Snart Lives, M/M, Meta!Len
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-25
Updated: 2019-09-25
Packaged: 2020-10-27 20:43:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20766668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Moriavis/pseuds/Moriavis
Summary: Leonard survived the explosion of the Oculus and had to confront the grief of those he left behind.





	when the work of grief is done

**Author's Note:**

> What?? Another story?? This is for the coldflash week prompt: Len's Oculus power.
> 
> Thanks to dungeonmarm for looking this over for my own peace of mind.

~*~

Leonard opened his eyes, blinking spots from his vision. There had been light and pain and now he was… what was he? Dead? Did Lisa recite the _El Maleh Rachamim_ or a Kaddish for him? There was a pang in his chest at the thought of his sister, and he pushed it away, turning his eyes on the dim interior of the bar he was sitting in.

If this was the afterlife, it seemed especially shitty that death was a knock off bar that smelled like spilled beer and body odor. He pushed back his chair and stood, taking stock of himself as he headed to the door. Missing his gun, but that was expected. His limbs seemed to be in the right place and nothing hurt, so that was a small victory and he was going to take it.

He pushed open the door and stepped outside into a humid, balmy evening. He recognized the intersection, the flickering street light that gave off a weak yellow glow. He was in Central.

Leonard glanced up at the sky as if he could figure out what power had brought him home. "Thanks," he muttered. "You could've sent me somewhere a lot worse." He ran his hand over his hair, taking a minute to figure out what he was going to do. 

He didn't think he was a dibbuk, didn't feel anymore malicious than usual, and the idea of being an ibbur was laughable. Run of the mill ghost it was, then.

Leonard stuck his hands in his pockets and thought of Lisa again. It wasn't terribly surprising when he took a step forward and discovered Lisa's apartment door in front of him. Convenient. He tried to walk through the door, but it was solid. He sighed, resorting to the indignity of knocking. What was the point of being a ghost if you couldn't scare the hell out of your kid sister?

Lisa answered the door, hiding her hand in a way that immediately told Leonard she had a weapon, and she gasped, her hand flying to her mouth. "_Lenny_?"

"Surprise?"

Lisa's knife clattered to the ground, and she yanked the door open all the way, throwing her entire body into a hug that almost rocked Leonard off his feet. They'd never been particularly affectionate, not physically, so he awkwardly hugged her back, patting her hair. He'd been almost paralyzed with fear when Mick threatened to kill her, when the time masters tried to get their hands on her. It was never gonna happen, not on his watch.

"Mick told me you were dead," Lisa choked out, and Leonard squeezed her tighter.

"I think I am. I think I just got blown up."

"We don't have enough time to unpack all that," Lisa said, choking back a tearful laugh. "It's been months, jerk. Months. Come in, I can offer you my couch, at least."

"Okay." Leonard paused. "And maybe a beer."

Lisa rolled her eyes. "I've got that too, loser."

Leonard grinned at that. "And to think I missed you."

Lisa wiped delicately at her tears so she wouldn't smear her make up and took Leonard's hand, pulling him up the stairs and into her apartment.

~*~

The biggest problem about being dead for a while was that all the powers of the criminal underground of Central had shifted: the Santinis were a declining threat, but the Pellagras were on the rise, and the framework he's begun working on with the Rogues was broken into pieces, each super villain out for himself.

And to be honest, after going through time and space, corralling a bunch of criminals with no life plans seemed a little boring. Was retirement finally on the horizon? One last score that would set him up for life?

Leonard missed the feeling he got from doing something that mattered, and wasn't that just a kick in the ass?

So, when he got a tip that Trickster and Rainbow Raider were up to no good, it seemed the natural move to go to STAR Labs to give Barry a heads up. And maybe the idea of scaring the crap out of him made the idea a little sweeter.

The labs were empty when Leonard came in, and he rolled his eyes at the lack of security. He'd encountered two locks on his way in, and they'd both taken him less than ten seconds combined to pick. He looked at his watch, then chose a chair to sit in while he waited.

It took longer than he expected, but eventually he heard movement in the hallway, and Barry Allen stepped through the door, followed a moment later by Iris West. Leonard's skin prickled as he looked at Barry, cataloging all the differences since the last time he'd seen him in Siberia. He seemed more serious, drawn thin like a rubber band stretched out to snapping. Something in Leonard ached to take Barry in his arms and let him _rest_.

He was still shaking that idea out of his mind when Barry's eyes lighted on him in the chair, and he smiled, bright and welcoming. "Leo! You didn't tell me you were coming to visit!"

Leonard blinked, caught off-guard by the sound of his childhood nickname coming from Barry's mouth, and he stared up at Barry like an idiot, until concern darkened his green eyes and his smile faded.

He was an idiot. If only there was a rewind button for this kind of thing--he wouldn't be caught off guard by seeing Barry so close again; he'd have something pithy to say. Barry opened his mouth to say something, turning to Iris, and then—

—he turned back to Leonard, his smile returning and his eyes lighting up with recognition. Unidentifiable sounds spilled from his mouth, and he and Iris walked out of the lab backwards.

Leonard rubbed his eyes. What. The hell. Was. That?

Barry and Iris walked in again, and this time Leonard felt a peculiar tug, a draining of his energy as they walked right back out again in reverse.

He couldn't help but laugh. He _did_ have a goddamned rewind button.

~*~

In the end, Leonard waited outside the labs, leaning against the wall in a way that reminded him of being a teenager, loitering in front of a public building he'd just vandalized. When Barry passed him and then did a double take, looking closer, Leonard was more prepared for the welcoming smile.

"Leo! Did you forget to tell me you were coming for a visit?"

Leo. It was enough to give a guy a complex. "I don't know who gave you permission to use that name, Barry, but no one's called me that since I was three."

Barry stared at him like he'd grown another head, and the friendly welcome crumpled into a devastated hope that was painful to look at. "Leonard?" he ventured, and Leonard's stomach tightened happily in a way that was entirely unwelcome. "_My_ Leonard Snart?"

_That_ slithered warmth all the way from his scalp to his toes in a way he didn't want to investigate. "Whether I'm _yours_ is debatable."

"I…" Barry sucked in a wet breath, his eyes glossy and wide, and Leonard had _not_ signed on for crying. "They said you died."

Leonard shrugged. "Obviously, reports of my death were premature."

Barry shuddered, like he was struggling for air, and then he was in Leonard's space, lightning sparking off him as he grabbed Leonard's forearms and squeezed like Leonard was the only thing keeping him from shaking apart. "Why didn't you _tell_ me?"

Alarm sang out along Leonard's nerves, and he jerked a little, shifting in place at the quick movement. Barry didn't seem to notice, though, as he pressed his forehead to Leonard's and breathed like he was trying to fight a panic attack.

It hadn't occurred to Leonard that Barry might have missed him.

"I didn't think we were close enough for this surprising display of grief," he said, because he was an asshole.

"Shut up," Barry rasped. "Please, just. Just let me." Leonard waited for Barry to finish his sentence, but it was like he'd forgotten what he was going to say. His hands were still tight on Leonard's arms. He was shaking.

"I'm here," Leonard said, and Barry made a sound too much like a sob for Leonard's comfort. He slowly, carefully extricated his arms from Barry's grip and drew him into a hug. Lisa had needed a hug.

The tears that Barry had been fighting broke all at once, and Barry clutched at Leonard, crushing his face to the curve of Leonard's neck. His shirt was going to get wet and snotty, and Leonard winced at the pang of guilt that accompanied the thought. "It's okay, kid," Leonard said. "I'm here. I'm real."

Barry nodded but didn't move, and Leonard settled in to give him as long as he needed.

~*~


End file.
